The title of this article comes from “Nothing is certain except for death and taxes,” a famous quote often attributed to Benjamin Franklin. To this I’ll add another certainty, the one of Criticism, which, if you’re an author, often comes publicly in the form of a bad review. This review is usually penned by someone you’ve never met and who you never invited to see your Fringe Festival show in the first place, gosh darnit. To many people, critics are the original trolls, predating the internet by millennia. They are the party poopers who turn your much anticipated book launch into a chagrin-filled scat-fest. They’ve been around since the first poets scratched cuneiform verse onto clay tablets, only to have them smashed over their heads without warning. They’re not going away any time soon, and that’s a good thing.